So I write this entry two days after watching this film. I have had time to process it but I don't know if I really have. Please bear in mind while I was watching the film, Christmas Ale had just arrived in stores, and the further I got into this film, the further I got into the ale. When the horse exploded, I had to pause a moment to consider if it actually happened or not.
It happened.
A goddam horse bomb.
And that wasn't the craziest thing in this film.
Film #11 Django Kill... If You Live, Shoot! (1966)
Here is the imdb.com cast listing. Here is the wikipedia page about the production.
First let's establish that there was an Italian western made before this called Django starring Franco Nero that was a huge success. Due to its success, many, many films attached the name Django to their titles and made unofficial sequels.
I have seen the original Django. It is a badass film with a great lead and some very sudden and effective gun violence. If you have not seen it, seek it out. It is worth it (more on that down below).
This film I believe was just called If You Live, Shoot! before the studio added the Django Kill! portion.
The plot (?) is that a man simply called the Stranger in the film, is found near death by two Indians who nurse him back to health. They say he has crossed over and saw the other side and will aid him if he tells them what he saw of the 'happy hunting ground.' He does tell them about what lead to his near death in a mass grave. He was double crossed by a man named Oaks who wanted to take all the gold dust that they stole from a Wells Fargo covered wagon. The Indians located the Stranger's share of the gold dust and made him quite a few golden bullets that he can use to complete his task of getting revenge against Oaks and his men for trying to kill him.
Meanwhile, Oaks and his men end up in a town nearby, looking for horses. The townsfolk are very off putting and none too friendly as his men ask about getting supplies. They figure out he and his gang are wanted (and a couple see the gold being carried with them in some saddle bags) and decide to attack then and eventually hang them all.
The Indians and the Stranger (D'Stranger?) soon arrive in the same town. The Indians say they don't know the name of the town but their people call it The Unhappy Place. They find the hanged men and join the mob as they are hunting down Oaks. The Stranger shoots Oaks full of gold bullets. The townsfolk are happy Oaks is dead, but they don't trust this new person any more than they did Oaks.
Okay, this all sounds fairly normal for a western and the plot does go on a little further than this but to try and track it all down and for me to make it make sense would be a challenge. I will get into some more of the story elements in a moment but I need to stop and explain why what happens next really threw me.
The gun violence in this film is very tame in the sense that you hear a gun shot, a guy clutches his side and falls down. There may or may not be a red splotch on his clothing as he lies there dead. Very PG, very much like a lot of westerns I have seen to this point.
Oaks is not dead and is brought inside to be worked on in order to save his life because a man named Sorrow, who is basically a mob boss, wants to find out more about the gold dust and if there is any more out there. When the improvised doctor cuts into Oaks, you see the blade dig in and the blood start to pour. Oaks is screaming in pain. The man cutting tells Sorrow that the bullets inside Oaks are gold and all the men nearby plunge their fingers into the bullet holes and try to dig them out. It is fairly graphic and with the rich bright red of the blood, brighter than any blood would actually be, it punches your eyes in their face.
I did not realize this western wanted to be a horror film until that moment.
The film doesn't stop there. There is a lady kept as a prisoner in second floor room with a window with iron bars that stares at the Stranger. She appears silent but looks to know what is going on. There is the wife of the hotel/saloon owner, who when looking through a keyhole at him dividing up the gold dust, chews her lip in an almost orgasmic way. Her stepson (I think?) seems to be attracted to her and lashes out by taking a knife to her fancy clothes. One of the Indians gets BRUTALLY scalped and you see the skin being pulled away from the head.
And then there is the horse bomb.
*slow clap*
Oh, and there is a very Game of Thrones inspired death at the very end that I refuse to ruin here on the off chance you will want to watch this film. It is three dollars to rent on Youtube. Pay the three dollars just for that scene. It will be worth it.
The weird back and forth of the very tame gunshots versus the savage blade cuttings makes for an uneven reality that keeps this film feeling very dreamlike. Pile on top of that an English dubbing that does not always match the pace of the talking and the odd turns of phrase that show up ("Come to my home, this is my house" or something like that was said at one point) and a very hypnotic guitar riff that plays throughout the film and you end up with something that feels like a brightly colored nightmare.
This isn't a horror film but it is very off putting in its tone like Rosemary's Baby or The Omen. The over the top violence is borderline cartoony but with how serious it is treated, it gets under your skin.
I will need some time to let this one gestate and maybe give it a rewatch before I truly know how I feel about it. I am glad that I watched it and would recommend others see it too if you are looking for something really different.
Any film with the balls to strap a bunch of dynamite to a horse will always have my attention.
Western Checklist (nowhere near official or scientific):
- Weird gang member names? I liked that the one criminal boss was named Sorrow. You have to have some named Sorrow in The Unhappy Place.
- Beautiful landscapes? There was a powder white desert in the first part of the film that provided a wonderful contrast to the violence taking place.
- Does a building catch fire? Absolutely, with horrendous results. Seriously, pay three dollars and find out for yourself what happens.
- How many Ernest Borgnines? None that I can tell. Hell, he may have been in there. That would complete the nightmare vision. Much like when Gary Coleman showed up in Hell.
- Does it have a theme song with the name of the film in the title? No. But the original Django does and it is one of my favorite intro themes to any film.
Rating:
3.5 out of 5 tin stars. I didn't hate this film but it sure did knock me sideways while watching it. The visual color palate is crisp even if the story isn't. The violence, even compared to films of today, is still unnerving. This one isn't for everyone, but for those that have even a slight interest in after what I said will probably enjoy the hell out of it.
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